Kicking The Tires On Eklund's Pens Rumors

OK so our famous friend Eklund is hearing grumblings that the Penguins are interested in two high-priced players.

Which players?

Anaheim Ducks defenseman Chris Pronger and Minnesota Wild winger Marian Gaborik.

Now I'll give you a few moments to let your brains try and comprehend seeing either of these two players in a Pens uniform.

Go ahead, I'll wait.

.......

Done? Good, because let's analyze this strictly from a salary cap hit standpoint. Just for giggles, let's use Eklund's own salary cap central figures to further prove the absurdity of having either of these players. Even with prorated contracts and blah blah blah it doesn't work out, but let's look at this with the raw numbers shall we?

The Penguins team salary is $56,257,567 leaving $442,433 to remain under the cap. Pretty tight squeeze right? Let's look at Pronger first.

Chris Pronger - $6.25 million with one year remaining.

In order for this deal to happen, the Penguins would need to at least get in the ballpark of salary going the other way. How do they get near $6.25 million?

Based on raw numbers, Miroslav Satan ($3.5 million) and Ruslan Fedotenko ($2.25 million) gets them close. However, there is no way the Ducks would trade for both of these guys considering their contracts run out at the end of the season.

So, shy of trading Evgeni Malkin or Sidney Crosby this deal is moot.

The main objective so far appears to be getting a top 6 forward for Crosby's line, so why would they consider trading away a couple forwards to get a defenseman when they are so obviously thin up front with scorers?

Also consider, the Penguins just traded with the Ducks last week to get Chris Kunitz! Why would they trade with the same team twice in a week?!

Moving on.

Marian Gaborik - $6.33 Million

Would I love to see a healthy Gaborik on the top line with Crosby? Umm, yes. You'd have to have no pulse in your body if that combo doesn't give you chills. However, again according to the numbers that Eklund has on his site this cannot happen.

Who would the Pens give up to get Gaborik?

Jordan Staal? Probably, but he's only making $2.2 million so combine that with the roughly $440K and we're up to $2.6. Still roughly $4 million short. Satan and Fedotenko could be in play there too, but again they'd be giving up 3 forwards for just 1 in return. Maybe 2 if the Wild threw in someone like Derek Boogaard ($875,000).

What about Hal Gill ($2,075,000) or Mark Eaton ($2,000,000)?

Now you're just fixing one problem and creating another by depleting the defense to add in some offense. What if instead of Boogaard the Wild sent back Marc-Andre Bergeron ($1,254,000) or Kurtis Foster ($1,025,000)?

The rumor before the season was dealing Staal and Ryan Whitney for Gaborik and something. That would have gotten the Pens to the magic number, but alas it didn't happen and now it's really not going to happen.

Trying to crunch the numbers on any of these deals is mind boggling and frankly not worth my time because these deals can't happen unless Ray Shero blows up the team and feels like having three guys eating up 75% of the payroll next season.

Can I also just say that the Pens dealt for another Marian at last year's deadline? We all know how that turned out. Learn from your mistakes Shero. Beware of Judas version 2.0.

Eklund also just reported that the Penguins have had discussions with San Jose about Jonathan Cheechoo.

I could very easily see Cheechoo coming to Pittsburgh based on cap space and who we have on the roster that could be traded. I can't imagine the asking price would be very high for the one-time 56-goal scorer. With just 21 points on the season (9 goals, 12 assists) in 49 games, the Sharks may just want to unload him. Who knows?

Perhaps a deal of Cheechoo for Satan? Where do I sign?

Now I know that wouldn't be the deal, but I'm allowed to dream.

Now another rumor I saw earlier tonight from Spector, states that the Penguins are interested in bringing back Jarkko Ruutu.

I can't imagine the Pens would bring him back in after letting him walk after last season. Wouldn't Shero have re-signed him last summer if he really wanted him back?

Don't get me wrong, opposing teams would fear a line with Matt Cooke and Ruutu on it. Imagine two of the leagues' biggest pests roaming the ice on the same line. Fun isn't it?

The Pens play the Bolts Tuesday. Let's keep an eye on the roster to see who's normally in and who isn't in the game.

Crosby may return from a groin injury that has held him out of the last three games as well. If he doesn't play watch for message boards everywhere to say "CROSBY TRADED!" Obviously, he's not going anywhere. Write it down.

NHL Headlines 3/31/08

This was a long and hectic weekend to say the least. I had plans of getting a post up on Friday, but thanks to laws requiring me to have a license to drive that idea went out the window. No, my license wasn't suspended or anything, I just needed to renew it. Still a complete pain to do.

Anyway, now that my bracket is officially dead thanks to Texas losing to Memphis yesterday I can once again devote all my attention to hockey.

Here's a look at the day's headlines.

Wild Clinch Playoff Berth With Win Over Avs

Congrats Minnesota on a fine season thus far. Marian Gaborik and Pavol Demitra have stayed healthy for the majority of the season for the first time in history it seems like. Figures that the one year I don't take him in the fantasy world, he actually stays healthy. Side note: If you even have someone you want to see injured or miss some time to help your fantasy match-up, drop me a line. I swear I'm a hex. In football alone this season I went through 8 QBs.

Anyway, Minnesota will clinch the Northwest Division title with one more point or a Colorado loss of any kind. They currently hold a four-point edge over the Avs with two games remaining for each squad.

Here's the highlights from tonight's game.



Yes, the Flames have a snowball's chance in the fiery pits below to win this thing, but they'd need to win out and get a lot of help.

Sharks Kill Fighting Gretzkys Playoff Hopes

Phoenix fans should be very happy with how this team played this season and should be excited about seeing these guys again in the Fall. They now have a goaltender who can actually stop pucks in Ilya Bryzgalov, with a kid in the wings in Al Montoya who will be able to step in and play solid games as well.

The Sharks continue to impress with their play and utter dominance lately. This was the Sharks 17th win in their last 19 games. You always hear talk about teams getting hot at the right time. Well right now there's none hotter than the Sharks.

Joe Thornton has been a machine of late, which is helping one of my other fantasy teams put up a respectable fight in some consolation game. Not even sure which right now as I'm only focusing on knocking Gopher off his pedastol.

Side note: The finals are a two-week marathon. After week 1 I control all 8 of our goaltending categories and hold and 11-4 lead after week one. Really all I need to do now is pick and choose which games I want my goalies to play and get some production out of the offense and I'll be hoisting my mini Stanley Cup in 7 days.

McCarty Makes Return To NHL

Welcome back Darren. I was never a big fan of this guy because I'm not a Wings fan, but you have to give credit to a guy who realized his life was going down the tubes and made the effort to get things back on track.

I have a lot of respect for people, not just athletes, who realize they have a problem of any sort that is ruining their lives and relationships and do something about it.

Britney Spears, if you read this....WAKE THE F%&# UP! YOU HAVE 2 KIDS! STOP BEING A MORON AND GET YOUR LIFE BACK ON TRACK ALREADY! I'M TIRED OF POSTING STORIES ABOUT YOUR SORRY ASS AT WORK EVERY DAY. IF THE FACT THAT K-FED HAS YOUR KIDS DOESN'T DRILL SOME SENSE INTO YOU, I DON'T KNOW WHAT WILL.

Side note: If you haven't seen the Britney Spears episode of South Park go look it up online or Tivo it ASAP. If she doesn't end up suing Comedy Central I'd be shocked. It's that hilarious/wrong.

I have to say something here. I absolutely hate pop music and hate how these supposed "stars" get so much coverage when they screw up. Do you have any idea how many people get DUIs everyday? Why is it news when Spears, or Paris Hilton get caught breaking the law like anyone else? WHO CARES?!

Anyway, back to hockey.

Koivu Could Miss 4 Weeks

What a blow this is to the Canadiens. Compound that with the loss of defenseman Mark Streit and this could potentially be the equivilant of pushing the self-destruct button.

This is the time of year where teams face and overcome adversity, but how will the Habs respond to losing these two guys. Especially Koivu for what could be about a month.

Both players will be evaluated later today and at that time perhaps a timeframe of return will be announced. In any event, both players sat out their game Saturday against Toronto. It's not quite panic time yet, but it could be very soon.